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Monday, April 23, 2007

Overheard In The Titty Bar

Girl 1: What are you doing? You don't smoke!
Girl 2: I only smoke when I drink.
Girl 1: That makes no sense.
Girl 2: Yes it does, it's like the pooping and peeing thing.
Girl 1: The what?
Girl 2: Yeah, it's like, I can pee without taking a shit, but if I'm pooping, I'm going to pee as well.
Girl 1: Ewww.

Guy 1: So, I heard from Jamie the other day.
Guy 2: Dude, I heard she's got, like, five STD's.
Guy 1: Yeah, I think she's up to genital warts now.
Guy 2: I'm glad I fucked her a few years ago!

Dancer 1: So, has anyone ever come on you?
Dancer 2: No, how about you?
Dancer 1: I almost had someone come on me.
Dancer 2: How did you know it was almost?
Dancer 1: I could feel it throbbing. That's how you know.

Guy 1: So, how are things with Christy?
Guy 2: Oh, they're good. She's already let me put it in her ass, like, twice.
Guy 1: Wow, you guys haven't been seeing each other that long.
Guy 2: I know man, I wasted, like, three years on Michelle and only got to put it in her ass once.

9 Comments:

Blogger ADW said...

Very Funny!!!

That Michelle - what a prude......

9:32 AM  
Blogger 6th Floor blog said...

So relationship health is determined by how often you get to put it in her ass? interesting.

11:39 AM  
Blogger Steve said...

Wow, seems like all the blogs I read are doing these "Overheard" things. They're all pretty funny, but yours are definitely the most graphic :) The grossest overheard conversation I had at the liquor store was:

Clerk 1: I think there's two people doing it in the bathroom.
Clerk 2: Eww, I'm glad I just went.

Steve
Liquor Store Stories

11:45 AM  
Blogger n said...

Haha!. I thought I heard some crazy things at the place I volunteer, but these are right up there.

-N
Soup Kitchen Stories

11:19 AM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

ohmygod that was so freakin funny!

2:31 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

it is posts like this that are the reason i don't "romanticize" the 2 years i spent working at a titty bar.
thanks, for the reality check. really enjoy your sense of humor and your blog.

11:04 PM  
Blogger meatball666 said...

overheard in a titty bar where I was a regular:

waitress:"What's wrong?"

unknown:"Fuck man! I lost so much money 3 days ago. They caught 1500 kilos of mine in Clova."

waitress:"Wow! that's something !!!" then she winks at me.

Me:"So you know Stephane then?"

unknown:" WHO? WHY? eeee....no."

Me:"Oh, nothing it must be something else then, cause my friend got caught in Clova (200 people town in Quebec) 3 days ago and I tought for a second that he got fucked cause they only paid him to deliver 500."

He paid his beer and left.

7:07 PM  
Blogger Mz Bowailey said...

LMAO! Love this post, Waitress. I have missed you in my absence!

11:35 AM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

SMH at the Christy/Michelle comment. Good grief, guys! If you want to stick in someone's bum so bad, find a man friend who swings that way, you know?

8:25 PM  

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