I'll never understand why men bring their hookers (ahem, escorts if you're p.c., and women who will have sex with you if you're honest) to a strip club. To me it rather defeats the purpose. A strip club, despite all it's drama and subsequent interference, serves as a safe-house where men can come alone or in groups, and engage in titillating
conversation *pun intented* with attractive women. Paying is an option (albeit a strongly preferred option).
That said, I don't understand why some men bring their hookers to a strip club. It would seem a rather distracting and financially draining expense; especially if she is charging for the hour. I can sympathize to a degree with men who choose to get a hooker after
leaving the strip club- unrequited sexual interaction and proverbial
blue-balls have been known to cause a few rash decisions. And engaging with a hooker or two has been known to cause a few rashes. (Bad-um chaa
I suppose the rather ideal situation in this case would be to meet a hooker at
the strip club.Why would that be ideal,
Because it segways
into my next topic: the hooker who once danced for us before we knew she was a hooker.
About a year ago we had a dancer who came to us from another bar, and her name was Monarch. She was a very tall, boisterous
black woman; and boy
could she drink. This girl would down seven or eight LIT's
(Long Island Iced Tea's) during the evening. She was loud, strong, crass, and a hooker. At least, we found out she was a hooker later.
We had an idea she was prostituting herself a few weeks after she started. She was a really good tipper. Really good.
Not to say that all hookers are good tippers- this was just a little extreme. She would tip five or six dollars on a drink. When the girls onstage weren't making any money, she would tip them out of her pocket. She tipped the DJ's
out fifty or sixty dollars, which is quite more than they're used too.
One night, our DJ was up in the booth with his girlfriend, also a dancer. When Monarch tipped him out for the evening, Girlfriend made a comment that she really liked to tip well.
"This is my fun money," Monarch replied. "I make my real money selling pussy on the side."
Wow. When we heard about this, we weren't really sure what to do. It's really not a good idea for a strip club to knowingly employ a hooker/escort. You can get into all sorts of crazy litigation's
, not the least being soliciting. Luckily
for us, we didn't have to wait long for proof.
Monarch was an entrepreneurial
hooker. This bitch had business cards
. She was passing them out to customers after they tipped her. It was one of those "you like what you see here? Why not give me a call later and we'll meet up. Here's my card."
We don't even allow the dancers to leave with customers, let alone meet them later for a quick "hide the salami" for an undetermined sum of money.
We found one of the business cards on the table, but were unsure of who they belonged to. We decided, in the best interests of the club, to perform a mandatory bag search. The rest of the cards turned up in Monarch's bag.
Monarch went nuts
when we confronted her with the business cards. She didn't deny they were hers; however, she just resented the fact that we would no longer employ her at our establishment. She began screaming at everyone
in the club. Here we are, attempting to close our registers and wipe of our tables, and she's screaming- no, preaching
at the top of her lungs about how she has a business that doesn't involve us, and she's just trying to make a living and take care of her children.
During all of this she's prancing around the building, getting in anyone's
face who will listen to her, all the while attempting to convince us that she deserves to keep her job. It was quite the spectacle.
The trouble came when the DJ told her to shut up, she was giving him a headache.
Monarch went off like a fuse had been lit underneath her ass. It was "bitch I'll fuck you up" and "don't talk to me like that you fat asshole" and she went as far as to call someone (and I swear to you this happened) a "dookie
Who says dookie
anymore? Hookers, apparently.
It was then that they decided, in the best interests of everyone, to escort Monarch outside to her vehicle; however, not before she managed to slug our door guy across the face a few times.
Moral of the story: don't piss of a hooker. They fight too.