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Tuesday, September 19, 2006

Free Willy

It's Friday night, and my shift is almost over. Luckily I went home and took a nap after class so I'm not nearly as tired as I was last Friday night. It's been a rather slow night, and I'm hanging out at the bar waiting for last call, when one of my dancers, Sam, comes out of the dressing room.

"Hey, can you go get me a towel?" She's preparing to do a shower stage.

A shower stage is something different that we have at my club. It's a separate room connected to the dressing room where, for a fee, you can sit and watch your favorite dancer, or two, take a shower.

I get Sam her towel and sit back at the bar. A few seconds later she comes bursting back out of the dressing room.

"Oh my god, Waitress, seriously, the shower." She's laughing so hard that she can barely form complete sentences.

I walk to the shower stage and peek in. Immediately I jerk my head back out of the room and scream for my DJ.

"DJ!!! Seriously!!! The shower!!!" Now I know how Sam felt.

DJ walks to the shower stage, sticks his head in, and immediately jerks it back out. His mouth is agape, a look of shock and humor spread across his face.

Inside the shower stage sits an old man. His pants are down around his ankles and his shirt is pulled up over his belly. There, on full display, is his willy, standing at attention.

DJ, not wanting to let this comic gem go unnoticed, yanks the curtains in front of the shower stage open.

Across the room are two guys sitting at the bar, having a conversation. One guy notices the commotion and looks up. His jaw drops and he starts to slap his friend on the arm, while his friend is still talking. From my position at the bar I can hear this conversation.

"So, I was telling her," the second guy is saying "that I-- dude, what? Why are you hitting me? Oh my GOD! What the fuck is that!!!"

About that time four dancers burst out of the dressing room, collapsing with laughter. They too, had let curiosity get the better of them and peeked in on the peep show through the dressing room connection.

I look over at the shower stage, where DJ and floor guy are now trying to kick this guy out, without having to touch him. Apparently he doesn't seem to understand what he did wrong. When they finally convince him to put the mouse back in the cage, they escort him to the front door.

DJ comes back in shortly and heads to the dressing room. I can hear the laughter from my seat at the bar.

Sometimes, all you need is a good peep show to keep the night going.

12 Comments:

Anonymous Anonymous said...

At least that old man can still get it up. That was probably the best night of his life. ;)

12:46 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

this moment brought to you by the makers of VIAGRA!
lmao... these moments are priceless. Once knew a barmaid that would put HUGE stacks of napkins in front of guys that tried tossing off while sitting AT the bar (did they think know one would notice or is it the thrill of getting caught that excites them?)...lol

Just say no! (to spinach)
GJ

5:27 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

PS: forgive the spelling error in post numero uno, gracias :)

5:28 PM  
Blogger SkippyMom said...

Aww [snuffle, gasp] that is so [gulp] sad. He probably [giggle] i am NOT going to laugh he probably [snort] has alzheimers...oh heck!!!
bwahahhahahahaha...I can only imagine.....bless his heart and his winkie!

Oh gyspy jo - that is so funny too, in an ewwww sort of way - what do guys think?

Thanks for the post Stripper! :)

5:45 PM  
Blogger Jennifer said...

lol, how many times do i have to tell you i'm not a stripper i'm a waitress?!?!

always,
waitress

5:47 PM  
Blogger Josephine H. said...

funny story!

hi! I *am* a stripper and student...there are few blogs about the industry out there..its nice to find one...

check mine out: about my experiences living next to a crack house
http://cracktivist.blogspot.com

12:25 AM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

I wonder why men are compelled to touch their willies at ANY time. if a woman "adjusted" herself in public the way men do, I can only imagine what would be said/thought!and no, camal toe in the club doesnt count, LOL

GJ

7:19 AM  
Blogger Wide Lawns said...

I would have paid money...

9:25 AM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

Buying a Beer: $5

Paying for a Shower Stage: $50

Seeing an old man w/ his pants around his ankles & Johnson at full attention: Priceless

Great story Waitress! *See I get that you're a waitress & not a stripper*

9:42 AM  
Blogger SkippyMom said...

<---------see Skippy beg forgiveness....

I am sorry, just took the first part of the moniker, but then again my bad, because I don't suppose Subservient Worker over at "Wide Lawns and Narrow Minds" would want to be called "Wide" eh?

Sorry Waitress, really. Forgiven?

10:39 AM  
Blogger Jennifer said...

LOL, if you knew how many times a night I get asked "when do you go onstage," or "how much for a lap dance from you" you would laugh as well. Of course you're forgiven, and I was never really mad!

11:52 AM  
Blogger SkippyMom said...

;)

7:01 PM  

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