Sunday, October 08, 2006

Cast and Crew

So, I don't know if anyone has noticed lately, but the names have changed concerning my co-workers. I went around the bar last week and asked everyone what their pseudonym should be. The responses were quite amusing. So, without further adieu, I'd like to introduce you to the people who make up your friendly neighborhood titty-bar!

Raymond. Raymond (formerly known as "Boss," took his name from the show "everybody loves Raymond." He stands approximately 6'3, and is a hulking Italian breed of man. Personally, I wanted to call him "Donnie V" or "Luca Bratsi" but hey, whatever he wants!

Captain Egghead Orgazmo: Formerly known as "Manager," he originally wanted to be called simply captain orgazmo, but realized Captain Egghead Orgazmo was CEO, for short.

Duke: Formerly "DJ," he decided on his name while high on pain killers from a toothache!

Elvis: I haven't written about him yet, he's our other DJ who works during the week.

Glen: Our floor guy/cook (yes, we serve food). He took his name from one of the Chucky movies, don't ask me which one... I have a huge fear of dolls.

Champ: Our door guy, "Champ" is his "wrestling" name, on some game he plays.

Esmerelda: My other waitress, tiny little latina, who likes to call herself a "mexican't" because she can't speak Spanish. I wanted to call her Hamburgesa. She objected. Go figure. She and Duke are an item.

Queenie: Our hostess, funny name because she's 5'2 and weights maybe 1oo lbs. She and Champ are together.

Ellen: Second bartender, don't know why she likes this name. She and Pierce are together.

And there you have it Ladies and Gentlemen. Welcome to the strip club. I am, and always will be, your faithful Waitress.


Blogger mish said...

i think you forgot to tell us who "pierce" was....

that said, I really love your writing and story telling abilities.

10:05 AM  
Anonymous Nana said...

Teeny, tiny quibble ... it's 'without further ado.' Just thought a student would like to know.
That said ... love your writing!

10:13 AM  
Blogger Wide Lawns Subservient Worker said...

Waitress, I love your names! My co-workers are a lot less imaginative with their pseudonyms. Stacey and Michael. One of the property managers said he wanted to be named Gustavo Cohen-Klein. Not sure why he wanted to be a latino jew, and hyphenated, but that was my best answer.

10:30 AM  
Anonymous Kiz said...

That's a lot more 'items' than I'd expect in any given establishment. I take it in your place, coworker relationships are all fine (excepting the dancers)? K

11:56 AM  
Blogger i'llnevertell! said...

Oh yeah, Pierce and Savannah!! Sorry, I wrote that in the DJ booth last night after WAYYYY too many jager bombs! (MY head hurts...)

Pierce is our floor guy/sorta manager. I've written about him before. Savannah is my bartender.

Yeah, a lot of our people are paired off. Every employee is married or in a relationship.

Sorry about the "adeiu", again, blame it on the intoxication!!

1:13 PM  
Blogger Pearl said...

Sounds like quite the cast. Which we of course already know to be true.

3:21 PM  
Blogger Johnny Wadd said...

Speaking as a former DJ...i doubt those painkillers were for a 'toothache'! :)

1:18 AM  
Anonymous Gypsy_Jo said...

Waitress, is there a "housemom" that takes care of the girls in the dressing room and if so, is she titled?


9:41 AM  
Blogger i'llnevertell! said...

yeah, duke is the "housemom" (isn't that cute!!)

basically, he gets the schedules and tip out and other stuff like that.

11:26 AM  
Blogger Thy said...

Captain Egghead Orgazmo?

very nice.

sounds like a fun place to work.
minus the drama of boobs waving through the air.

2:44 PM  
Blogger China Doll said...

Good stuff. I'm awful at coming up with blog monikers, honestly.

5:48 PM  
Blogger Aarwenn said...

Hi, who is Pierce? Did you slip and get in a real name?

3:56 PM  
Blogger Ryann said...

hahaha Johnny I'm with you on that poor "toothache"

nice cast... bring on the drama

9:28 PM  
Anonymous public displays of aggression said...

these stories suck. though too boring to be real.

5:16 PM  

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